How to Control Your Temper

Teachers are human, and humans get angry. When you’re dealing with students, parents, and possibly administrators and colleagues who are experts at pushing your buttons, it’s inevitable. Most of the time, we can deal with it pretty well, but what about if you are not just angry, but furious and in danger of losing it entirely? What then?

Yelling, Throwing Things, and Getting Physical is a Bad IdeaI think we can all agree that yelling, throwing books, breaking things, punching walls, and getting physical with students will only lead to more problems. And of course you would never do any of that if you were calm.

The problem is, in this moment of rage you are not thinking rationally, if indeed you are thinking at all. Your head is buzzing, your vision has narrowed to a little pinprick, your teeth are clenched, and all you can hear is your pounding heart. This is a true emergency, and what you need is an emergency plan.

Emergency plans need to be put in place before there’s an emergency. You think about what you can do to minimize damage and keep everyone safe. You have a backup plan and a way to get help, and you practice it ahead of time. Once you have a plan, you no longer have to make decisions during the emergency. You just follow the plan.

Watch How to Control Your Temper on Awesome Teacher Nation TVWhile creating your plan, be sure to take into account how you will de-escalate yourself. Some common ways are breathing, drinking water, clasping your hands behind your back, and so on. Also think about how to escape the situation gracefully. I like to tell the student I can’t talk right now and then go to my desk or step out into the hallway.

You might also find it helpful to have a trusted colleague you can call for help. That colleague can take the student away for a minute or two, or take over your class while you go to the bathroom or go to the drinking fountain.

Even if things don’t go perfectly, you will have a much better chance of success if you have planned ahead. So go ahead, take a minute and think about what your best self would do in that situation. And just know that no one is perfect, and everyone gets angry – even teachers.

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